I know someone has gotten into my systems (either it's for a good cause or bad) when I couldn't wait to tell my sisters (translation: Veronica, Mariana, Irene, Astrid, Kristi, and sometimes Stephanie because we rarely meet) about him or her. It is obvious that I'm so in the process of liking him, so I've made sure Veronica, Mariana, and Irene are with me every step of the way. One night, I was texting both him and Mariana and I had this crazy idea of introducing Mariana to him by asking her to write something for him that I would screenshot and send to him. So she did, and he sent a picture too as a reply.
I couldn't help but blush reading those words, especially the last sentence, although it was meant for my sister. The later part is best described with actual quotes. Words in the brackets mean emoticons used.
V: (closing-eyes monkey)
L: Haha, it's really terrible with paint, but I hope she likes it.
V: You do realize I can read what it says on the picture, right?
L: Haha, yes of course! Did I write something bad? (shocked cat)
V: No, you kinda said you liked me. But I don't know. (princess)
L: You know, liking as I really like talking with you. (flustered face)
The butterflies stopped moving all of the sudden. I stared helplessly at my sister who is trying to sleep. "Veronica, he doesn't like me that way." But I had to play it cool.
V: I know, hahahahaha I like talking to you too!!!
L: VICTORIA! Sometimes you scare me haha
So he was relieved I didn't think more than that!
V: HAHAHA I didn't mean to this time. What did I do to scare you?
Geez, look how fake I was.
L: "You kinda said you liked me, but I don't know." I thought, "Ooh, man, she doesn't like me." (sweaty face)
Wait, what?! "Veronica, he does like me that way."
V: Ahahahaha!!! Luuuu. I meant like this, you can like me as a friend. But you can also like me as.. You know, more than a friend. Haha.
L: I know but we only know each other for a few days. But let's be honest. IF we are going to like each other more than friends, what then?
HUH?! "Veronica, he doesn't like me that way."
V: I'm not in the mood for this. Let's talk about something else?
L: Ooh, okay sorry.
And we went talking about something else, which was really uncomfortable. I was literally laying on the very edge of my bed, wanting to stab myself. An hour later, I said I wanted to sleep, to which he replied, "Okay. Thank you! Don't want to talk like this, this doesn't feel right. Night." I had to bite my lip reading that. What doesn't feel right?! What doesn't feel right?!?! This time Veronica had already fallen asleep, so I was left with no ally at all. I should just turn off my phone. Okay.
Seven minutes later, after forcing myself to sleep and failing miserably, I decided I would (wo)man up.
V: Luis..
L: Yes?
V: What doesn't feel right?
L: I'm sorry if I have been too sweet or something. I will slow down if you like. It just felt so strange that we talked curtly. Or it looks like it. You know if something is wrong, tell me, I will be there for you.
Just. What. The. Fuck. Is. He. Talking. About. And why the hell was my sister asleep! Okay, I'm delusional, he only means as friends.
V: If anything, I think I like you a little bit too much than I should. Should we call it quits?
L: You think that is a bad thing? Because I feel the same way. But it feels strange because I only know you for a few days. I won't give you up so easy..
HUH?! But he said.......
V: You said yourself IF we like each other more than friends, there's nothing we can do.
L: How you mean? You mean the distance?
WHY are you even asking me this! You said it! Let's just say yes.
L: So you don't even wanna give it a chance?
You said "what then?"!!!!! I thought I was the most confusing human being in the planet.
V: You never asked whose wedding I attended yesterday.
L: You married?
V: Omg I was so close to tears and now I'm almost explode of laughing.
L: Omg my heart is beating like crazy.
V: *I almost explode of laughing. See I can't even get my grammar correct.
He couldn't have thought I got married and still texted him! Geez.
L: Sorry I forgot to ask. We talked non-stop. Whose marriage was it?
V: My grandpa has a driver. The driver has a daughter. The daughter graduated from university in German literature. She married a German whom she met on Omegle. My point is... Stuffs like that happen. But I don't know if such luck will happen to me too.
L: Okay, but you are not sure about it. Why do you want to quit while we even didn't try anything?
V: Cause I don't feel like you want to give it a shot. Do you?
L: Whatttttt!!? Of coourse I want! Please Vic. I have never been so nice to someone I just met. You are joking about the player thing, but I really never did this to any other girl. And if you don't believe me, I didn't even check OkCupid for days just because I really liked the way we talked.
Shit, Butterflies, stop flying around!
That's true.
L: So why do you think I don't wanna give it a shot?
V: "I know but we only know each other for a few days. But let's be honest. IF we are going to like each other more than friends, what then?" >> You really slapped me with this.
L: It was a question. It wasn't meant like, "Ooh, then there's nothing."
Anybody has a gun? I feel like shooting myself. Or him. I'll decide it later.
V: What do you think of me? What do you think of... us?
L: Okay, so I will try my best English because I notice that sometimes it's the English... YOU: Okay, so this is kinda hard. When we started talking, I felt a click. I don't know how or why but feelings never lie.. You are funny, cute, sweet, and meany in a good way. How respectful you talk about family, I mean, I can't even think of a better girl. The pictures are just everything. There is nothing I don't like about you.. And yes, maybe that's why I really start to like you. Okay, and US now. US: It's just that we have so much in common. We don't drink, smoke, nor do drugs. We don't like cats nor dogs. Okay, so you like Germany, of course, and you are smarter; we can't be twins... You correct my English and you really make me smile. And that is making me happy. And I already feel bad if we have an argument of something.. But yes, we live oceans away. But for me that doesn't feel like not giving it a chance.. And I know I am not perfect.
Wait, why haven't I gone to heaven already?
V: You're perfect for me.
VIC????!!!!! Just what in the world did you say it for?! Veronica will be fuming tomorrow when she hears about this.
L: Why don't you wanna give it a chance then? That kinda hurt me.
Payback time.
V: Did you think it made me happy? Since we're at this, I'm just gonna be honest anyway. Even things like how you didn't wanna be on the phone with me hurt me.
Okay, that was exaggerating. He'd told me he didn't wanna call me because he's afraid of his English.
V: I just didn't choose to show it. Instead, I went along asking other things to hide my annoyance. Lu, it wasn't because I didn't want to give this a chance. I didn't think you like me more than a friend. I've been hurt so many times. I was going to stop things because I was afraid I liked you more and I'd end up brokenhearted. I swear I couldn't stand more hurting and heart breaking story Lu. If you don't think of me like what I think of you, it's better if we end this.
Happy now?
L: I told you clear how I feel about you. So please send me how you feel.
This guy.............. Gosh. I never needed to explain how I felt to guys before! Why am I doing this?
V: And I've told you, you're perfect for me too. I couldn't believe how hard I tried to memorize your family tree. :')
L: No, but really what do you like about me. I have been hurt many times too. That's sweet, I tried yours too, but it's too big. I made pictures of it.
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.. That's about the craziest but sweetest thing someone can do. Fine, I'll give him the explanation he deserves.
V: You're sweet. You're attentive. You flirt back with me. You put up with my crazy attitude. You take Ryan to soccer. You bring cupcakes over to Manuela. You have Faysel, Ikram, and Badr on your WhatsApp picture. You share chocolate mousse with your mom. You risk your friendship with me when you said your Dad was not a subject to jokes. And you casually mention Guus, Niek, Danny, and Antonio's first serious girlfriend as if I had been in your life for so long. Haha, I can't believe I'm embarrassing myself by writing all these.
L: Please don't feel embarrassed. This is good for 'us'. If there was something I did too less in previous relationships, it was talking.
V: Although I still can't believe why you hate McDonald's. Nobody can hate McDonald's. (six french fries)
L: Because I know it's so bad for your health, I can't even imagen.. So I will do a lot for you but I will not go to the Mac. (flustered face)
V: Imagine, Honey. :P
L: That's why I can't be happy with a girl here in Holland.. If I said things like, "I have to babysit my nephew" they said, "You are different." But they didn't mean it good. If I talk with you, it's just way different. I even forget to eat when I am talking with you. So please, never say I don't like you again.
I swear there should be a policy against butterfly to fly around so aggressively in someone's tummy.
V: Just to be clear, so you like me?
L: Yes.
V: And you want to give it a shot?
L: Yes.
Hehehehehehehehehehehe. That was quite a long conversation to re-tell, but it was worth it. Right before I went to sleep, he texted me, "So, I am happy we talked about this. You know, it feels like we are on the same line now. I know we will be honest to each other so it's gonna be okay. And btw, yes we are oceans away, but you feel soooo close. :) Goede nacht Schat en rust uit. :)"
