Thursday, February 19, 2015

Feb 19 - BuzzFeedYellow's Take on LDR

I was reading LDR Magazine last month and found this (I think on its Facebook page),


"What It's Like to be in a Long Distance Relationship" - A video by Buzz Feed Yellow.

Luis and I clearly have different views than most people in this video.
Nevertheless, this made us laugh!

Feb 19 - L(o)uis!

This whole post is triggered by my long WhatsApp chat with my girl Uty (missed her so much!), who, towards the end of our chat, asked me this, "How is Luis btwwww, I heard he went to Cuba."
I literally laughed hysterically because it was Louis Cole from FunForLouis channel who went there, not Luis, haha!
My sister and I actually have spotted this a long time ago, how is it that I only know two guys with that name and I'm completely obsessed with both!? :D

I even came clean to him a few days ago that sometimes, I can't decide which one is pronounced "Luis" and which one is pronounced "Lui", hahaha, he was pouting but I know we both know it's only because 1) they do sound very similar, 2) both of them are in my life a lot, and 3) I raaaaaaarely call Luis by his name; most of the time I use pet names that would make you gag, hahahahaha..

Other than extraversion/intraversion personality, they both are amazing with kids, selfless, humble, adventurous, family-oriented, chilled, and inspirational.


Love them!

Feb 19 - Essie Button's Long Distance Relationship Story

I've heard of Essie Button for quite some time now but I hadn't watched any of her videos yet, up until today.
I can't remember what dragged me to this video but I just felt like clicking on it and I was in for a real treat!


Essie, a Canadian beauty blogger and YouTuber, apparently met her now boyfriend Aslan from England through Omegle chat, a few years ago.
They hit off instantly and gave it a year before deciding on flying to see each other.
These two first facts immediately switched the lightbulbs in my head (since it's super similar to our story) on and at the end of the video, I decided that I've fallen in love with them already!
Not too long after meeting each other, Essie decided to move across the globe to live with Aslan in London, and things are looking great for them, it makes me so happy!

Long distance relationship: one, try to find someone closer: zero.

Tuesday, February 17, 2015

Feb 17 - The Best Advice for A Long Distance Relationship

A lot of people ask me how I make my (super duper) long distance relationship work.
Here we go:
Invest in an iPhone or webcam for your laptop and try to 'see' each other at least once a week.
You'll be surprised of how much easier filling him in on your day-to-day events, compared to regular texting or calling.
Plus, you can make screenshots to stare into when he is not available to talk!


And the best part is, you can include people in your life so he gets more sense of your daily life.


Good luck!

PS: It's week 7 in 2015. I figured it might be a good example to insert 6 screenshots to resemble those past weeks. In reality, obviously you are allowed to have as many video calls as you'd like (as long as it doesn't interfere your schedule and more important priorities) or fewer (I understand it's not feasible for every LDR couple).

Feb 17 - "Blame Insecurity"

I thought I had grown tired of wedding-gown-long posts (the last one was an exception cause you simply can't have short roundups), but when I was shown this article by my best friend Venessa, I knew I just had to share this.

"I’ve dated a lot of people. And in most cases, I rushed into a relationship with each person, either because I felt pressured by their ultimatums of “being monogamous” or “moving on”, or because the excitement of a brand-new infatuation was so shiny and tempting, I just couldn’t resist the possibility of the love story that had the potential to follow.

When I met my now husband on an online dating website, we emailed back and forth for two weeks. Eventually it felt right to meet in person, and within six months we were living together and within two years we were married. I’m sure our family was concerned we were rushing, but our pace made sense to us.. We trusted ourselves, as individuals, to be true to our hearts and honor our respective needs.

We’re told to not rush into relationships, that we should take our time and get to know a person before we commit to them. And while I would agree that time reveals the nature of people, I’m not sure rushing is the problem. Instead, I think we risk heartache and trouble when we actively begin relationships before having a strong sense of self and an ability to negotiate terms of commitment with kindness and bravery. Relationships are really hard work, and if you haven’t quite figured out who you are, that hard work is going to be even harder. And as cliché as it may sound, you really can’t love someone else until you love yourself.

Of course we have struggles and insecurities and stupid things we do, and we will always be changing, growing and learning throughout our lives. But when I look back at some of my most serious relationships in the past, the common theme was always a lack of self-confidence. Either on my part, or on theirs. I just didn’t know how to ask for what I wanted because, frankly, I didn’t know what I wanted. And guess what? You can’t find out what you want until you trust yourself enough to seek out new experiences and ways of being with someone. The bad news is you might go through several breakups and tough situations, but the good news is, with each relationship you’ll learn more and more about yourself and what you need to do to be in a healthy, loving partnership with someone who is also committed to being secure and balanced.

Rushing into a relationship isn’t the culprit. If you want to blame something, blame insecurity. Meeting someone new, growing close, becoming vulnerable, and standing up for what you want and need, these things take confidence. So instead of worrying about moving too fast, or taking your time, or any other arbitrary adage about dating, focus on yourself. Get to know yourself, trust yourself, love yourself. And if you meet someone you just plain adore, rush on. But don’t ever lose sight of how important you are to yourself, how special your heart is and how much goodness you deserve."

According to my past experiences, it also has something to do with luck.
Okay, that was a lie so let me rephrase it: successful tales heavily rely on luck.
My favorite YouTuber of all-time, Louis Cole, went to Australia and stayed at his close friend Rachel's house, he found a framed quotation in her living room (minute 9 of this video) that says,
Love bravely.

Have fun learning about yourself! Go figure out what you want and deserve, focus on finding (or being found by) that someone you want, you deserve, wants you, and deserves you. Ditch insecurities and love bravely, because that person, no matter how quick or slow the process takes, could be your love of a lifetime.

Feb 16 - Round Up of My Top 7 Fave Dates (Summer 2014)

Honestly, never take my words when it comes to me making plans (and promises) to write regularly on this blog.
I recall pronouncing I'd be posting everyday's diary all through the days he was here visiting; obviously I wasn't.
This roundup of seven favorite dates of mine (I tried downsizing these to five but I just couldn't!) hopefully will make amends and pose as a hint of how unforgettable last summer was to me:

1. Perfect Little Picnic
His favorite photo of me (he's having this printed).
When / Where: Aug 21 / Island Creamery, Gading Walk
Introduction: We were supposed to have a South Jakarta tour with my girl friends Theresa, Naila, and Ester that day, but Naila canceled that morning so we thought we'd just reschedule it to the end of the week. 
Favorite part: We randomly took a bajaj (his favorite mode of transportation, haha) to Kelapa Gading Mall, packed a few pastel and risoles from Ma'Cik in a plastic container, and took a stroll at Gading Walk (the place was basically empty!) before deciding to get some ice cream to enjoy after the savory little cakes. So there we were, playing a little picnic outside of Island Creamery ice cream shop with our snacks and ice creams, taking in the breezy wind and colorful scenery we got to ourselves.
Moral: It was a relaxed, laid-back, and low-key date that successfully made a point that it doesn't matter whether the date is all glitzy and glamorous or just spontaneous and cozy, we'll always have a good time together.

2. Failed Safari Night 
A very non-flattering picture of us four at a Sate Maranggi place, taken at a little before midnight.
When / Where: Aug 30 / Puncak
Introduction: Rio picked us up near our area and we all drove to Ega's house before leaving to Puncak for the Safari Night, since they only have it on Saturdays and this was his last Saturday here in Jakarta. What's unexpected was Puncak was over-crowded that they enacted that silly rule of alternating the directions of cars. We (climbers) were halted for hoursssssssssss before it was our turn to take the road! As a result, we missed the show by 5 minutes. You read it right, the last bus left at 9pm and we arrived at 9.05pm.
Favorite part: We were dead tired from the failed attempt, but we got to hold each other ALL night long in the car. He, still in a recovery of another stomach bug thanks to Jakarta's unhygienic environment, slept in my arms and there was no better feeling than that. It was such a lovely memory that's irreplaceable. Plus, this was a double date with Rio and Ega, our favorite couple who was suuuuuper sweet and helpful the whole time he was here. What they did means so much to us. RIP our best friend Nikolas Satrio.
Moral: A disaster, when undergone with calm and sincerity, could result as a blessing in disguise.

 3. Dreams Do Come True
Perfection redefined.
When / Where: Aug 9 / Ah Yat Seafood Restaurant, Grand Sahid Jaya Hotel
Introduction: Other couples start from first dates and work themselves up to a real relationship. We did it the opposite way. In fact, it took us almost a year to have our first date.
Favorite part: Everything went so well and ever so smoothly. The timing was perfect, the place was incredible, the food was divine, and the expectations were far exceeded. Read the full story on flashback mode here.
Moral: Patience is a virtue. Everything was worth it.

4. Minnie Mouse's 22nd Birthday
A picture worth-sharing everywhere.
When / Where: Aug 15 / My house
Introduction: The first time we realized we have matching t-shirts by chance, we just knew we couldn't ever lose them and they were basically a staple item for this summer.
Favorite part: Finally, we didn't need to edit two separate pictures of our selfies wearing the Mickey and Minnie series into one couple picture; we WERE in a frame together wearing them! And come on, what could have been a more appropriate time to be doing this, other than my birthday?
Moral: His presence was the best present anyone could ever give me for my 22nd birthday. 

5. Happy 1st Anniversary!
The most appropriate place to celebrate our first anniversary.
When / Where: Aug 24 / Segarra Beach Club
Introduction: Prior to this perfect anniversary dinner, we went to A Thousand Islands without realizing we ordered the wrong package. The so-called port, a fish market, was utterly disgusting. The vehicle, fishermen's wooden boat, was anything but sturdy and comfortable. The blazing sun, powerful enough to burn my already-tanned skin tone, was the worst enemy of his not-100% physical condition. The cab we took to move from that, um, port, to Ancol beach apparently had its taximeter broken, causing us to pay so much (I was too exhausted to do anything past glaring at the sinful driver and praying for him to get the golden ticket to hell). Even to enter the whole complex, we had to go the extra miles (quite literally) because the ticket counter didn't accept debit cards (looks like they couldn't move on from 1980's just yet).
Favorite part: We witnessed things went from one extreme to the other. We are such beach people and seafood lovers. That dinner was right up our alley! Hands down the most romantic night we have ever spent as a couple. Plus, the gorgeous, candle-decorated strawberry cheesecake with "Happy 1st Anniversary, Schatje <3" I ordered made an entrance just on time (he was surprised!).
Moral: Bad things need to happen so we can appreciate good things even more.

6. Meeting My Friends
Both of our phones' wallpapers, that's how much we love this picture/day.
When / Where: Aug 14, Sea World
Introduction: He was having a terrible tummy pain! Most likely following an irresponsible act of me and my girlfriends Ega and Uty who took him to eat at Sate Padang Ajo Ramon. I don't think I would be able to understand how he managed to not show the pain to me and focus on my happiness instead. He knew I had been waiting forever to go to this place with him and he was being a fantastic sport by giving his all not to worry nor upset me.
Favorite part: That moment when you had just seen all of the beautiful and mighty creatures in the underwater world and you came out of that building to your wonderful boyfriend saying, "I've never seen you so happy."
Moral: The more selfless you are, the higher people will think of you (no wonder I think the world of him).

7. The Promise Ring
The view from Skye Bar and Lounge, Grand Indonesia, taken by Ega and Tegar.
When / Where: Aug 27 / Cikini Gold Center
Introduction: I'm happy to receive chocolate treats from him at any given day, but pricey just-because gifts? No, thank you. He (and practically everyone in my life) knows that I'm not that kind of girl. I can take care of myself just fine and he knows best not to offend me by buying me things to 'help' me. Promise ring, however, is a whole other thing. We've agreed on this (him getting me a promise ring) since a really, really long time ago and I would be lying if I said I wasn't excited for this day to come! We had been looking for rings for a few days now but nothing really stood out to us.
Favorite part: One day, today, we decided to dedicate an afternoon to look for rings. We went to this place, a gold center, preparing to be overwhelmed by so many choices at so many stores in one building, and having to make hard decisions on which one to buy. It wasn't like that at all. We scanned the whole floor, pointed at an alley, stopped at a random store, fell in love with one specific ring, and decided to try that one out. They only had one more piece left and it was my size. It was pure magic.
Moral: Eventually, all things will fall into place.

Honorable Mention:
(You didn't seriously think I was only gonna lay out seven events, did you?)

Photo taken by Zuleika Rega

Photo taken by Catherine Dian

No details needed. May these speak for themselves.

Monday, February 16, 2015

Feb 15 - Happy Valentine's Day!

I wouldn't understand what it is about October that just stops me from carrying on with writing here!
Two Octobers back to back, I was led into a loooong haul and an undecided period of blogging halt.
Anyway! I'm back for good. And by for good I mean I'm in a much better condition and that Luis and I are doing better than ever.

Let me just put it out there: We do not celebrate Valentine's day. At all. In his words, more or less, "Valentine's day is only a time of the year that people are suggested to spend more," behind the whole love gimmick, I might add.
But as a long distance couple, any holiday is a momentum to get/make something special for your significant other simply because you have a solid reason to. :D

So we did get/make something for each other for the sake of Valentine's day.

What he got me!
A few months ago he shocked me when he came home with a Minnie Mouse doll as a just-because gift for me and now he got me this adoooooooooorable mug together with fun chocolate eggs! He's really mastered the art of surprising me.

What I made him!
A DIY project I've been seeing all over Pinterest that I finally decided to make. I had prepared another DIY gift but after discussing with him, I decided it'd be better as an 1.5-year present this coming Feb 24.

After the gift exchange within the first minutes of Feb 14, I needed to sleep and he was visited by his sister and her kids, so we needed to say good night and part anyway. I then had a full day planned out with my best friends from university and he was out celebrating his closest friend Guus' birthday (followed by an all-guys party which consists of Real Madrid match, a movie, and, you guessed it right, video games, haha). But even with such scarce conversations and limited time to be with each other over phone and text, it still felt special, just as special as last year where we were together most of the time on this particular day. Compared to last year (he baked me a batch of super cute heart-shaped cakes, beautifully decorated with pastel-colored icings and little edible letters, accompanied by a huge heart-shaped lollypop that said "I Love You" and I made him 14 different, little Valentine-themed gifts for the the days in February leading to this date), I would say this second Valentine has successfully showed me that the happiness we give each other is effortless.

PS: He called me in the middle of my dinner with my friends (as per my request, obviously, he is not one to disturb my time with friends and family) and greeted me with, "Hi, Valentine.." Needless to say, that made me giggle so much!

PPS: Nawang, if you are reading this, this post is dedicated to you. Love you, Girl.